All Posts in Ascending Order

My name is Christina, and I am a compulsive overeater. When I joined Overeaters Anonymous on December 27, 1998, I weighed 326 pounds. I was abusing food and couldn’t stop. I had tried reducing my food intake, going on diets, joining diet programs, and exercising—all while shaming myself for the way I looked and behaved […]

Even though I was an average sized kid I knew the way I ate was not OK because my mom told me so.  Repeatedly.  From around the age of 8 or 9 she explained that if I continued to eat the way I ate I would be 500 pounds and no one would want to […]

I went to my first OA meeting on Sunday December 27, 1998.     The baggage I carried into that first meeting was “not sure how this will work when nothing else has” as well as “this was the second worst Christmas in my dysfunctional family’s history”.  (Pretty bad when you can rate how bad a Christmas […]

In the Foreword to the First Edition of Alcoholics Anonymous, nick named “The Big Book” we read that “We, of Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body.”   This sentence explains that the alcoholic has a twofold illness; the illness affects […]

I am purposefully saying that the problem I have with food centers in my brain rather than saying in my mind.  I have experienced and observed when someone says “it’s all in your mind” the statement is meant to dismiss whatever information is being presented.    My second sponsor not only gave me the gift of […]

A friend in the program shared a non-OA article about “Choosing Your Hard” with me.  It said stuff like – being overweight is hard, losing weight is hard – choose your hard.  There was a whole list of “choose your hard” options, outlining that life is not going to be easy no matter what.  Here […]

Overeaters Anonymous’ definition of Abstinence is “Abstinence is the action of refraining from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors while working towards or maintaining a healthy body weight. Spiritual, emotional, and physical recovery is the result of living and working the Overeaters Anonymous Twelve Step program on a daily basis.” (Follow this link and read […]

When I take someone through the steps, I try to meet them where they are.  Most of the people I work with are like me in that they overeat, either bingers or volume addicts.  As we work on identifying trigger foods and behaviors we also work on their own healthy relationship with the foods they […]

The week that I started abstaining from compulsive eating I noticed that by the time my next meal rolled around I was ridiculously hungry.  I am not certain if my level of hunger was due to the fact that I never really allowed myself to feel hunger and I was just not used to the […]

Step 1 – Admitted we were powerless over food – that our lives had become unmanageable Christina’s version – Admitted we could not refrain from abusing food – food made our lives (or parts of it) unmanageable. Personalize it – Once I start abusing food, I can’t stop.  If I stop, I can’t stop myself from […]

  Step 2 – Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.  Do I continue to abuse food or do I accept that I need a higher power?  The choice should be easy, but it isn’t. Ask yourself the following questions: Do I believe that I am addicted to […]

As you read my posts you will notice that I refer mainly to the book Alcoholics Anonymous (aka the Big Book).  I know many have challenges with this book that was written almost 100 years ago. So why do I make this my primary resource for working the steps? The book is written for alcoholics […]

“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” Joseph Campbell    I have tried to explain that in Step 1 we have a two-fold illness; physical and mental.  Though the problem we have is two pronged, the real problem centers […]

I heard a few speakers describe the addiction problem and the 12 Step solution by saying we have a physical illness that requires a spiritual remedy.   My experience of being an active compulsive eater was throwing all my best ideas at my problem and not having anything work for any real length of time.   I […]

My first sponsor, TS, walked me through all the steps.  She may have tried to convey that I needed to continue working on the steps, but it was not something I took away from our work together.  After about 2 months in OA, I was releasing weight, following a food plan, and using the meetings […]

Why all this talk about God/HP/god?   This is why.  I believe the steps do not work for people who do not believe in the definition of the two-fold illness because that person will have no impetus to follow through on the rest of the steps. The chapter “How It Works” opens with the statement that […]

Step 2 – Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Christina’s version – Became willing to believe that there was a power bigger than myself and humans in general that could get me off the food abuse merry-go-round.  Personalizing it –  If insanity can be explained as doing […]

An exercise I like to work on with the people I sponsor comes from the a-b-c statements on page 60 of the Big Book.   “Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas: (a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage […]

In the post “16 – And This Is Why…” I explained that we are entering a period in the steps where we need to be tough with ourselves and we needed to know we were not horrible people while going through it.  We have a culture where we prefer to use softer words and try […]

In my post 19 – Hard Truth I pointed out that we cause our own pain.  Let’s dissect that a bit because there is a tendency to blame and shame ourselves for things we don’t actually own. My regular OA meeting was disrupted by a “Zoom Bomber”.  He interrupted the person speaking and announced that […]

In my post 18 – Being convinced, we were at Step Three I provided the a-b-c statements from page 60 of the book Alcoholics Anonymous.  I am at Step 3 if I am convinced that: I am compulsive with food and can’t manage it. No human power can solve my issues with food. A higher power […]

Step 3 – Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Christina’s Version – Decided to quit trying to be the boss and rely on a higher power instead. Personalizing it – I make a commitment to get through the steps and learn how […]

Step 4 is my favorite step to work on with the people I sponsor.  Most people who have been around the rooms think I am weird.  I am completely fine with that.   The point of doing an inventory is to uncover our self-will and clearly see the negative impact it has on our lives.  It […]

*** There are multiple ways of doing a fourth step inventory.  I try to follow the instructions in the book “Alcoholics Anonymous” to the best of my understanding.  This is also how I mentor people.  The point of step 4 is to uncover the things in our lives that cause us troubles and end up […]