Step 8 is a call to action that asks us to walk forward with courage, clarity, and compassion. It’s the moment we stop rehearsing our regrets and start preparing for change. After the deep inner work of Steps 4 through 7—inventory, admission, willingness, and surrender—we arrive at a threshold where we take the steps to repair the past. This step isn’t about groveling or guilt; it’s about aligning our lives with our higher power and values. As we begin to list those we’ve harmed and cultivate the willingness to make amends, we’re not just organizing names—we’re answering a spiritual invitation to live differently.
The Step 7 truth I hold close is this: I won’t mistake humility for humiliation. These steps are designed to help me see myself clearly and live in harmony with the world—not to make me feel small. With that in mind, I view Step 8 as further action toward that harmony, especially in my relationships.
The Big Book says,
“Now we need more action, without which we find that ‘Faith without works is dead.’” — p. 76
To me, this means I won’t grow through thoughts and beliefs alone—my actions must reflect my convictions.
From Inventory to Willingness
In Step 4, I discovered how much the world and its people dominated my thoughts and behaviors. I wanted things to go my way (selfish), I was dishonest with myself and others when they didn’t, I was inconsiderate—either through excessive “niceness” or controlling behaviors—and I was frightened when life didn’t match my expectations.
Step 5 allowed me to admit those truths out loud to myself and another person.
Step 6 helped me become willing to let go of the behaviors that kept me stuck.
Step 7 reminded me that I couldn’t do it alone. So I humbly offered my maladaptive patterns and old ideas to my Higher Power, while committing to practice better actions.
Step 8: The Hallway of Action
The directions for Step 8 begin with:
“Now we need more action…”
If Step 6 is the doorway, Step 8 is the hallway. It’s where we begin walking towards accountability.
Step 8 reads:
“Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.”
It’s a two-part step:
- Make a list.
- Become willing to make amends.
Resistance Is Normal—But Not a Roadblock
At this stage, we’re not making the amends yet. We’re simply making the list and fostering the willingness to follow through.
I have observed that there is a resistance to even write the list because we think we are going to have to apologize to the nasty so-and-so that hurt us. Amends aren’t necessarily apologies. Let’s start with what “amends” actually means.
What Does “Amend” Really Mean?
Here is the definition of amend from Merriam-Webster:
- To put right, especially by making emendations [corrections].
- To change or modify for the better—to improve a situation or alter something formally.
In 12-Step programs, amends also means compensation for wrongdoing—something you do or give to make up for harm caused.
In everyday terms, making amends means taking responsibility and actively working to repair the damage. It’s not just saying “I’m sorry,” but showing it through changed behavior, mindset, or meaningful gestures.
For example, I have shared numerous times that I tend to be a people-pleaser. Amends actually looked like saying no and building up the courage to have tough conversations or not apologizing when something wasn’t my fault.
If you feel resistance, remember:
“It was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over [our addiction].” — p. 77
When I feel resistance, I pray for the courage to identify where I need to make amends. I have a personal sense of God and trust the guidance I receive. I’m learning to accept life on life’s terms, without twisting myself to fit patterns or beliefs that don’t align with what I feel called to by God.
Willingness Looks Different for Everyone
For agnostics or atheists, willingness might come through:
- Self-talk (affirmations)
- Rational reflection (“What’s the worst that could happen?”)
- Collective wisdom (“It worked for others, so why not me?”)
My husband, who doesn’t identify with a personal sense of God, but also does not see himself as agnostic or atheist, wouldn’t pray for willingness—he’d practice it. When we talked about this post he explained:
“Somebody has to do this. And if I want to be a ‘Somebody,’ then I know who’s doing it.”
For him, it’s about personal morals, ethics, and self-respect.
Aligning with Something Greater
The purpose of Step 8 is to align ourselves with something greater than our own wishes. It’s not passive—it’s preparation for real change.
Making amends is spiritual action, not just emotional reckoning. It’s the moment we stop circling our past and start facing it with intention. We’re not just feeling our way through guilt or regret—we’re preparing to take responsibility, repair what we can, and walk forward with integrity.
A Glimpse Into Step 9
If you’re still hesitant about making your list or the amends themselves, here’s a forward look into Step 9. The Big Book says:
“We should be sensible, tactful, considerate and humble without being servile or scraping. As God’s people we stand on our feet; we don’t crawl before anyone.” — p. 83
This is a powerful reminder: making amends is not about groveling. It’s about standing tall in humility—not humiliation—and choosing to live in truth and accountability.
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