In my post 18 – Being convinced, we were at Step Three I provided the a-b-c statements from page 60 of the book Alcoholics Anonymous. I am at Step 3 if I am convinced that:
- I am compulsive with food and can’t manage it.
- No human power can solve my issues with food.
- A higher power of my own understanding can and will if I actively seek it.
The book then provides concepts which require attitude adjustments. I had to accept that I needed to quit trying to be the boss and rely on a higher power instead. I had to accept some hard truths about how my behavior caused me dissatisfaction and pain. This pain leads me to needing something to stabilize/soothe. The only solution I consistently chose was to abuse food.
On a side note, I often hear people at meetings describe themselves as emotional eaters. Me too! I ate when I was sad, angry, anxious and stressed. I also ate when I was bored or happy. If I had an emotion – I ate!
The third step prayer is about commitment to stop playing “the boss”, believe in a power bigger than myself and live a life that places that power at the center of my life instead of myself.
Step 3 Prayer
“God, I offer myself to thee, to build with me and do with me as thou wilt.
Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do thy will.
Take away my difficulties that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of thy power, thy love and thy way of life.
May I do thy will always.”
The book tells us we can use our own words, but to express this sentiment. When I am working with someone I encourage them to write their own version. The important part is to express the sentiments without reservation.
The sentiments in the prayer are:
- Surrendering or offering myself to my understanding of a higher power.
- Being relieved of self-will (“the quality of obstinately doing what one wants in spite of the wishes or orders of others”).
- Victory over my life difficulties so I can be helpful to the still suffering compulsive eater.
My sponsor, LC, explains the Step 3 prayer as a commitment to doing the rest of the steps.
We are encouraged to make this commitment with someone we trust and who understands what we are trying to do. Most of the people I mentor through the steps chose to make their step 3 commitment with me, but some have picked their spouse or pastor.
Warning! Caution! Warning!
I have observed that once the commitment is made a person feels so good about starting that they dilly-dally on the inventory process that follows and find themselves back in their compulsion. It is important to remember that we made a commitment to get through the rest of the steps.
On page 63 the Big Book says “This is only a beginning, though if honestly and humbly made, an effect, sometimes a very great one, was felt at once.” That paragraph ends, and the next begins with “Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action …” So be forewarned not to stop because you feel good. Our next instruction is to immediately launch into vigorous action. There isn’t room (or time) for dilly-dallying.
I use music and quotes to inspire me to keep moving forward. Here are a couple for you.
“The path to success is to take massive, determined actions.” – Tony Robbins
“It’s your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you” – Rumi
“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.” – Michael Jordan
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